Blessed

Ok. I'm not really sure what I am going to say here I just know I need to talk....so honeslty dont feel like you have to read this. It could get long. It's been somewhat of a long, stressful, sleepless week for me. For various different reasons. Moving into a different house and having your husband gone during the same week sortof tends to wear a person out. We did buy a new home..well new to us anyway it's actually close to 50 yrs old. And while there are many things a love about it there are many things I'm not sure about. It doesn't seem quite as charming or endearing as our other homes in the past, I guess it's just not really something I would have really ever pictured us purchasing. It's not my quant little cottage...it's just well...I regular old house. Don't get me wrong like I said I'm excited and it does have potential I'm just not sure I have all the energy and gusto to put into it right now. But I know when were finished it will be perfect and it will be ours. However I would really like to know what's wrong with me...why do we look around at what other people have and think that we should have more? I don't need more-I have plenty I am blessed with abudance. It's not always material things I long for either but things in relationships, creativity, spirituality and so forth. Then I find myself thinking "Gosh...why can't I be more like that?" Our "new" little home is sitting on a darling landscaped lot with fruit trees and bushes a quant porch. With our garage just about oh I dunno 25 yards from the railroad tracks. I have worried and stewed over this since we made the offer and then a friend pointed out to me "Kate, I think you are more worried about what other people are going to think of you living right here then you are about what you think." And I realized she was right. How ridiculous is that? I'm not worried about the train or the noise as a matter of fact I find it kindof ...I'm not sure if calming is the right word for it because it can get loud. But it does always remind me of a simpler time whenever I hear it go by. We have a fence; I'm not worried about the kids. Sadie loves to watch it go by. So I have come to the conclusion if it doesn't bother me...who cares if it bothers someone else? I have decided I will be proud to live here. When someone ask I will say yes we live on the "other side of the tracks" the good side! After an exhausting week Eli got home last night (he leaves Monday for 1 more week then life will get a little more normal) we got the kids to bed and I had relaxed in a nice hot bath I came and sat on the couch and helped myself to a plentiful serving a chips and salsa...all the craziness of the week sortof seemed to disapear and I just realized. I AM blessed! I am so blessed with so many little things. And more importantly I am happy!

Now I just need to remember it!

Sorry to ramble on...this probably didn't even make sense to anyone else but it was sure therapy for me to type it all up! Thanks!